I learned about the #woman in progress movement after watching a clip of Traci Ellis Ross on The Real. I’ll be honest before hearing her talk about it I was a bit skeptical about yet another hashtag movement. However, what she said it resonated with me because of the stage of life I’m currently in (about to graduate university). It made me think about what life was like for not only me but also for other women in their twenties a crossroads in life who feel the pressure to have it all together. We are stressed about the fact that we are not yet where we are supposed to be, we are not sure of what life moves we are making next or even where we are going. However, I have come to terms with the fact that it’s okay to not be sure of what happens next, it’s a part of life and all the little hiccups we encounter are all part of figuring out who we are. I thought it was great that I could accept that I being a #woman in progress but I wanted to nail down some things that I could do to enjoy the journey to becoming whoever I am meant to be and I decided to share them with you.
Acknowledge how far you’ve come
Progress takes time and it’s understandable to feel frustrated when things do not go as planned despite all the efforts you’ve put in. In those moments it’s easy to forget giving yourself credit for the things you’ve accomplished. However, I think that by neglecting how far we’ve come takes away our motivation to keep pushing forward because it feels like our hard work has taken us nowhere. However, when we reflect we can look back at all the challenges we’ve faced and realize that we are strong enough to keep moving forward. Personally, I like to write the things I’ve accomplished down on paper, however small those things might be, it really puts everything into perspective for me.
Perfection is Impossible
Perfection is impossible and sometimes highly overrated. Unfortunately, the pursuit of perfection seems to be everywhere and while I love a snap chat dog filter as much as the next girl social media doesn’t help in avoiding the perfection syndrome. Being perfect won’t make you happy, being the girl without a hair out of place all the time, whose room looks like an IKEA show house and whose Instagram feed is always on point doesn’t guarantee happiness, love or genuine connection. I think it’s great to focus on giving things your best effort but it is virtually impossible to be perfect all the time. Sometimes, we standout, succeed and connect with people because of our imperfections not in spite of them and we need to love ourselves enough to understand this.
Focus on your Goals
I currently find myself a bit envious of people who just seem to have their shit together and I keep stressing about why I don’t have mine together and why my dreams aren’t materializing like theirs are. But, you know the popular saying the grass is greener on the other side? Well, I think that the grass is greener on the other side only because we forget to water our own (drops mic). Sometimes we focus on what other people are doing and accomplishing that we forget to pursue our own goals and vision. However, to actually make progress in life we need to stay focus on OUR path and look ahead to where we are going. There will be distractions and failure, that much is inevitable but focusing on your goals means that you can accomplish them that much faster
Root for one another
Like I mentioned earlier it’s great to keep focused on our own goals and our own journeys but this doesn’t mean that we should be selfish about it. It’s important to understand that other women are walking their own path and like you will encounter challenges and distractions. However, instead of looking down on them or glorifying in their downfall this is where your empathy should kick in. Show support and root for other women. Tearing someone down or laughing at them when they are down just to make yourself feel better does not count as progress.
Like Beyoncé turn lemons into lemonade
Sometimes things will go wrong, you might not get into that school, or job, you might get caught out in the rain, forget your keys at home or drop your phone 18 floors (speaking from personal experience) but life happens and failure happens but it’s all about making the best of every situation. It’s about learning to deal with failure as they come and still moving forward because dwelling on the bad grade won’t make it better and dwelling on the interview you bombed won’t find you a new job. You have to just reflect on it and find a way to learn from it. For example, I now know to hold on to my phone tightly when exiting an elevator but on a more serious note learn to embrace everything that comes and know that this is not the end.
what are you most looking forward to this year? or what is something you are glad you’ve accomplished?