Taking The Time to Date Yourself

date yourself cover.png

Picture this: it’s a Friday night, you’ve just finished a hard week of school or work and all you want to do is relax and have some fun. You text your friends only to realize everyone has a date night planned with their significant other.

They kindly invite you to join, promising that it won’t be third wheeling, but you politely decline and the night’s possibilities slowly fade away. If you’re like me, you’ve somehow managed to be the single friend in a group of people who are constantly dating or have found their person.

This is in no way a bad thing, but your plans may start to revolve around whether your friends have dates or not, which can be frustrating. You may ask: What’s the solution to this when you’re not looking to date or simply don’t have the energy to? And the answer is to take time to date yourself! Who says you need a significant other to have a date night?!

I took it upon myself last month to take myself out on a date to see whether it felt as pathetic as it seemed or if it could act as a solution to intermittent boring Friday nights.

For a couple weeks I had been trying to rope someone into going to see Green Book with me – a movie that had won a few Oscars. It occurred to me on this particular Friday night that I could just get up and go by myself, so that’s just what I did.

Go to the Movies Alone

Initially, I was a bit nervous to go alone, mostly because I usually had someone to go to the movies with and had never pictured what it might be like to go by myself. After some self-convincing, a few encouraging texts from my friends, and an award-winning self-pep talk, I slipped my sweats on and headed out the door.

TIP: If you don’t think you could venture out alone for a fun night, going to the movies is a good place to start.

Everyone watches TV shows and movies on Netflix by ourselves and I’m sure we’ve all indulged in some accompanying treats – so what’s the difference at the movies?! Buy your ticket, get some snacks and see the movie YOU want to see; I promise you won’t have to make any compromises along the way.

Enjoy Dinner By Yourself

It wasn’t until after I had bought my ticket that I realized it was a ‘VIP’ movie – one where they serve you food and you can order drinks from comfy- couch-like seats. I’m not sure how I didn’t notice this but I had paid for the ticket, so I was set on going in. I admit it did feel weird because this seemed to be more of a dinner-and-a-movie date situation where I was surrounded by couples, but I didn’t get any of the funny looks I had feared and the waitress was extremely nice to me. I ordered a glass of wine with some fries and started to relax as the lights dimmed. The movie was fantastic and I was able to enjoy my Friday night

Going on a date by yourself allows you to entirely relax. You don’t have to keep up a conversation and worry about what you’re going to say next. You don’t have to share your snacks or fix your lipstick. You don’t have to worry about how your laugh sounds or what happens to your mascara when the movie makes you shed a few tears.

Enjoy your Accomplishment and Independence

Afterward, a sense of accomplishment and independence make you wonder why you haven’t done this sooner. Also, any fears of being along, or doing things by yourself start to disappear. I consider it a form of self-care; take time to treat yourself by doing something you truly want to do without anyone else’s wishes getting in the way.

Appreciate and Reward Yourself

It’s important to appreciate yourself and reward yourself for all you’ve been doing, plus it’s a great alternative to sitting at home and watching TV on your Friday night. I think everyone should try taking themselves out on a date because it may just be the best date you’ve ever been on.

Written by Ana Mota